Teenager Confession 002

Welcome to the depths of my mind.
Welcome to the center of it all.
Welcome to the place in which scholarly thoughts occur.
Welcome to the place in which immense decisions occur.
Welcome to the location of where mood changes occur like scenes in a movie.
Welcome to the place of learned experiences, of memory, and depth perception.
Welcome to the place where everything is different now.

Welcome to the place where now my mood is yellow and bright.
And come with me as we observe it going through various parts of my head.
The yellow is being tainted with colors of green and black
and red.
Welcome to the place where the only trace of yellow
is the desecrated being below us.
Watch my mood as it goes through the muck of brown.
It has entered an area of excuse,
of lies.

Of all the things in life I wanted,
I never wanted this.
I never asked for this.
Welcome to the place of never ending thoughts
and feelings
that there is nothing left in the world
accept for me to watch people die
and for everyone to quit on me.
I never asked for this.
I never asked for this.

I can't have one day
where I can think no darkness.
There will be no day
where I can tell my brain to make me smile.
There will be a cold day in hell
when I will be able to be me again.

I want to thank you for this.
Without you, none of this could have been possible.
Without you, I could have never had the misery I do now.
Without your days of addictions,
Without your days of bitterness,
Without your days of abandonment and torment,
I could never have any of this.
Thank you.

Welcome to the place that you create it.
I like to call it "Me".